(Firstly any Aussies who were needing sauce we just cooked up a fresh batch - BUY NOW HERE)
So it has taken us 2 years and 5 months since legitimately incorporating this Hot Sauce Company to finally get a T shirt up for sale. And it was worth the wait.
The front of the plain black shirt is simply emblazoned with 'Shit the Bed' in our signature font, to lure your friends in to asking, "What's all that about?" and then you turn around AND BLAMMO -- 💩💩 TOILET HUMOUR 💩💩
Designed by our lead artsy person here at Bunsters, a man simply known as Tom. By day he designs video game graphics, by night he plays video games and eats hot sauce and thinks about what is going on inside his guts. Here are Tom's musings that are printed on the back of the shirt:
How does Bunsters Shit the Bed work?
1. Hot sauce enters the mouth either directly from the bottle or atop some edible vehicle.
2. The flavour sensation in your mouth causes your tastebuds to send a burst of impulses to the pleasure centre of your brain, distracting you from the subsequent digestive trauma.
3. The sudden extreme heat causes your salivary glands to convulse and release defensive quantities of bodily fluid as your body prepares to reject the hazardous substance.
4. The intense heat causes blisters to form in your throat, preventing consumption of other fluids for relief.
5. The hot sauce, emergency saliva and stomach acid combine in the stomach and liquefy any existing food particles.
6. The liver shuts down and vents the gallbladder in to the digestive system.
7. The toxic slurry flows through your intestinal system gathering momentum as it prepares to scorch your sigmoid colon.
8. Finally, the contents of your bowels burst through your rectal cavity and seep out on to your linen. Meanwhile your flavour induced delirium reaches its peak as you lay in the fetal position.
It's safe to assume that Tom doesn't get out much these days. But you have to give him credit for using phrases like "edible vehicle", "toxic slurry" and "scorch".
This isn't Tom, it's Mike. He's a fireman from Las Vegas and he's well buff and he loves his shirt.
If you are a fan of Shit the Bed you need this awesome shirt so you can explain why you like it with eloquent fancy words and a comical medical diagram.
If you order one from Amazon it will get printed on demand. Shipping is $5 USD in the USA, $8 USD to Canadia and $10 USD to Straya.
They are really good quality cotton shirts for $32 USD.
The shirt is currently ranked 54,987 in Clothing, Mens Fashion, Sweat shirts. I'm not proud of this.
But this fact gives us an indication of the plethora of products that Amazon stocks and then I feel proud that this silly hot sauce from Perth made it to number 1 on the hot sauce list. Absolutely astounding.
Enjoy the shirts. Please don't ask for different colours or styles or designs. You will have to wait another 2 years and 5 months for a response.
Good Day Good Sirs,