G’day Ladeeez and Gents,
Before I start with the poo talk - good news! Amazon stuffed up the chocolate shipping cut off date. So if you want to order the last of our chilli chocolate bars - 2 for the price of one the sweet deal will finish Tuesday May 15. Get your orders in. Here's the link and use the code BOGOFBUNS to get 50% off.
A mate shared a story with me that was too good not to share. It’s a story that everyone needs to hear. All names and places have been changed to protect the people involved. But he’s not embarrassed, he’s provided me with the photos and screen shots of the event. I’ve still changed the details so I don’t ruin his chances of getting any poontang in the future.
So my mate “Jase” had just been on a boys trip to Thailand. It involved 5 days of non stop drinking and eating a lot of the local street food which can be known to cause a bit of an upset tummy and bum squirts.
He flew back to Perth during the day and then that night went on a Tinder date with a lovely young lady. He is quite a handsome man with a fit rig I might add. So this young lady would have been very excited to get to go on a date with him.
They were having a lovely time when Jase excused himself to go and do a wee in the gents. As he was standing there weeing in to the urinal, he shat himself. He didn’t even fart, he didn’t even notice the feeling, just boom – I’ve wrecked my pants with toxic weekend slurry.
So he shuffled in to a cubicle, got his pants off. Binned the soiled undies and then was left with with a shit stain the size of his fist right across the bum of his jeans.
Being a modern man, he took straight to his mobile phone and messaged the boys trip group chat for support….
As you can see he kept his date waiting 15 minutes while he frantically tried to get a mate to bring him a new pair of jeans.
He ended up using his socks to absorb most of the stain. Then in true MacGyver fashion he used a sock as a makeshift sanitary napkin to catch any further uncontrollable bum emissions during the short walk home. He whisked his date out of the restaurant very quickly and made sure she walked in front of him.
He got lucky that night, very lucky in many respects.
I think there was something in that for all of us don’t you.
We’re running a competition with the Inappropriate Gift Company. Win Mum her 3 favourite words Prize Pack. Head on over to Instagram and give us @bunsterswwand @inappropriategift a follow to win. Will be drawn on Mother's Day.
And just thought I'd share the best Netflix Comedy special I saw this week: Greg Davies - You Beautiful Beast